Saturday, January 30, 2010

The Fantastic Four!

So far this season, the Nets have only managed to scrape together four wins in 45 games. They are on pace to be the worst team in NBA history. This is old news, however. Because, the real story is...

This is the most memorable season in Nets history.

You read that correctly. This is the most memorable season in Nets history. Because, in the long term, you will remember EVERY time the Nets won this season. Your memories will blur all the losses together, but each win will be truly special. Do you think fans of the 96 Bulls remember all 72 wins? Of course not! In fact, those 10 losses probably provide the fuel in the memory fire. Let me recap the Nets four wins to date, and how each memory was special.

Mr. Fantastic

December 4, 2009 - Nets 97, Bobcats 91

The opening of the Nets season began with a losing streak that stretched forever - just like Mr. Fantastic. It claimed the health of several players and the job status of Lawrence Frank. But, thankfully, one cold December night, the stars aligned. I had bought a bottle of champagne the night before, ready to pop it when/if the Nets would get their first win. I watched this game in my girlfriend's new apartment with her and her mom (who had helped her move in). The win was pretty ugly, and I was on the edge of my seat the whole time - wondering how the Nets would blow it until there was 0.00 left on the clock. Once the win was secured, we all enjoyed some of the cheapest Cristalino around.

The Thing

December 8, 2009 - Nets 103, Bulls 101

Boy, this game was pretty ugly. I forget where I was earlier in the night, but I remember checking the scores on my cell phone as I walked home. By the time I got home, I was able to watch the last two minutes as the Nets gained leads, blew them, got the lead back, blew it, but then eventually won. Only Alicia Masters would want to watch this game again.

Human Torch

December 30, 2009 - Nets 104, Knicks 95

Nets just came out and torched the Knicks this game. Really, I did not see this victory coming at all. But, what made this more special - it was one of the few games I actually went to! At half-time, my ticket rep surprised me by moving me up to courtside!

Nice picture, huh? A courtside seat is unlike any other seat in sports; it is a completely unique viewing situation. Anyway, this was the first win I saw in person this season (0-3 before). But, fortunately, it was not my last...

Invisible Woman

January 27, 2010 - Nets 103, Clippers 87

Well, this is another game I went to courtside. This time, however, I purchased the tickets in advance. This game was a gift to my mom for Christmas. I bought the tickets right after the Bobcats win, and have prayed for the last two months that the Nets would win this particular game. My prayers were answered! (I have to say, in between my courtside sitting appearances, I went to two other games. Sadly, I can't go back. Courtside is too nice. I've tasted the high-life, and it is tough watching games amongst the commoners again. And yes, I am a tremendous douche. But the Nets are 2-0 when I sit courtside, so maybe I am good luck!)

Well, the Nets' backcourt was invisible this game, as both Courtney Lee and Devin Harris were injured. I immediately wrote off our chances of winning. Fortunately, Baron Davis and Marcus Camby also pulled out their invisibility cloaks, and the Nets soared to a win behind Keyon Dooling and The Hump (my new favorite Net).

And there you have it, the Fantastic Four. These memories will last throughout our lifetime. Memories of game winning shots by Damien Wilkens, Dwyane Wade, and Earl Boykins will fade, as will the numerous blowouts and....

Ah...who am I kidding? Somebody, help us! We don't have a coach! The players hate each other! The management hates the fans! Help us, Obi Wan-Prohorov! You're our only hope!


  1. I'm glad to see I get as much respect as The Thing here. You were at my place for Win #2 recording Episode #27.

  2. try to avoid the word 'kidding'...reminds me of #5 when the Nets had respect...tonite another meltdown as Clark Kent (aka Kiki) sat there